Jokes Journal

Welcome to Monday’s Edition!

In today’s issue …

1) The Judge & the Witness
2) Today’s Opportunities
3) Heaven or Hell?

The Judge admonished the witness,
“Do you understand that you have sworn
to tell the truth?”

“I do.”

“Do you understand what will happen if you
are not truthful?”

“Sure,” said the witness. “My side will win.”

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Bill Gates dies and is up at the Pearly Gates.

St. Peter: Well, you’ve got a choice. Have a look around
here. Pop down to Hell and see what Satan has to offer.
Check us out, and then let me know your decision.

Bill has a look around heaven. Lot’s of somber people
singing hymns, praising the Lord . He goes down to Hell.
There are beautiful beaches, lots of sun, sand, attractive
women. Long cool drinks that never get you drunk.
He loves it. He goes back to St. Peter.

Gates: Look, I know you’re really doing good things here,
but Hell seems more with it. More my kind of scene,
you know what I mean? No hard feelings, but I pick Hell.

St. Peter: No worries. You’ve got it.

Bill finds himself back in Hell, neck deep in fire and
brimstone, suffering eternal torment. He can’t figure it out.

Gates: Hey! St. Peter! Where are the beautiful girls and
long beaches and cool drinks?

St. Peter: Sorry if you got confused, that was just the
demo version …

Thank you for reading today’s issue of JOKES Journal.