Glad to be Drunk
Wednesday, September 23rd, 2009
Welcome to Wednesday’s Edition!
In today’s issue …
1) Glad to be Drunk
2) Today’s Opportunity
3) Student vs. Stock Broker
Glad to be Drunk
A completely inebriated man was stumbling down
the street with one foot on the curb and one foot
in the gutter.
A cop pulled up and said, “I’ve got to take you in,
pal. You’re obviously drunk.”
Our wasted friend asked, “Officer, are ya absolutely
sure I’m drunk?”
“Yeah, buddy, I’m sure,” said the copper. “Let’s go.”
Breathing a sigh of relief, the wino said,
“Thank goodness, I thought I was crippled.”
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Student vs. Stock Broker
Deciding to take a day off from his important job,
a young hot-shot broker went back to visit some
of his professors at his old school.
Entering the school, he saw a dog attacking a
small child. He quickly jumped on the dog and
strangled it.
The next day, the local paper reported the story
with the headline
“Valiant Student Saves Boy From Fearsome Dog.”
The broker called the editor of the paper and
strongly suggested that a correction be issued,
pointing out that he was no longer a student,
but a successful Wall Street broker.
The following day, the paper issued a correction,
with a headline that read,
“Pompous Stock Broker Kills School Mascot.”
Thank you for reading today’s issue of JOKES Journal.
