Two Lucky Patients
Friday, December 9th, 2011
Welcome to Friday’s Edition!
In today’s issue …
1) Two Lucky Patients
2) Today’s Opportunity
3) Heart Surgeon
Two Lucky Patients
In Ireland there is a mental institution that every year picks
two of its most reformed patients and questions them.
If they get the questions right they are free to leave.
This year the two lucky patients were Patty and Mike.
They were called down to the office and left there by the
orderly. They were told to wait as the doctor got their files.
The doctor came out and motioned for Patty to come in for
her questioning. When Patty came into the office she was
instructed to sit in the seat across from the doctor.
“Patty, you know the tradition of this institution so I imagine
you know why you are here. You will be asked two
questions, and if you get them right, you will be free to go.
Do you understand all that you have been told?” said the
doctor with a rather sly grin. Patty nodded, and the doctor
began to question her.
The first question was this. “Patty, if I was to poke out one
of your eyes, what would happen?” “I would be half blind
of course,” Patty answered without much thought.
“What would happen if I poked out the other eye?”
“I would be completely blind,” said Patty knowing that she
had just gotten her freedom. The doctor then sent her outside
while he drew up the paperwork and accessed Mike’s files.
When Patty got into the waiting room however, she told
Mike what the questions would be and what the correct
answers were. The doctor calls in Mike and he followed
the same procedure that he had with Patty.
“Mike, the first question is what would happen if I cut off
your ear?” “I would be blind in one eye,” he said remembering
what he had been told. This received a perplexed look from
the doctor but he just simply asks the other question so that
he could figure out what the man was thinking.
“Mike, what would happen if I cut off your other ear?”
“I would be completely blind,” he answered with a smile
as if he knew he had passed.
But then the doctor asked him what his reasoning was,
he said flatly,
“Me hat would fall down over me eyes.”
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Heart Surgeon
A mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor
of a Harley, when he spotted a world-famous heart surgeon
in his shop. The heart surgeon was waiting for the service
manager to come take a look at his bike.
The mechanic shouted across the garage, “Doc, can I ask
you a question?”
The famous surgeon, a bit surprised, walked over to the
mechanic working on the motorcycle.
The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag
and asked, “So Doc, look at this engine. I also can open
it up, take valves out, fix’em, put in new parts and when I
finish this will work just like a new one. So how come I get
a pittance and you get the really big money, when you and
I are doing basically the same work?”
The surgeon paused, smiled and leaned over, and whispered
to the mechanic, “Try doing it while it’s running.”
Thank you for reading today’s issue of JOKES Journal.
