Law Suit
Tuesday, June 23rd, 2009
Welcome to Tuesday’s Edition!
In today’s issue …
1) Law Suit
2) Today’s Opportunities
3) Contempt Fine
Law Suit
A farmer who’s been involved in a terrible road accident
with a large truck ended up in court fighting for a big
compensation claim.
“I understand you’re claiming damages for the injuries
you’re supposed to have suffered?” stated the counsel
for the insurance company.
“Yes, that’s right,” replied the farmer, nodding his head.
“You claim you were injured in the accident, yet I have
a signed police statement that says that when the attending
police officer asked you how you were feeling, you replied,
‘I’ve never felt better in my life.’ Is that the case?”
“Yeah, but …” stammered the farmer.
“A simple yes or no will suffice,” counsel interrupted
quickly.
“Yes,” replied the farmer.
Then it was the turn of the farmer’s counsel to ask him
questions.
“Please tell the court the exact circumstance of events
following the accident when you made your statement
of health,” his lawyer said.
“Certainly,” replied the farmer.
“After the accident my horse was thrashing around with
a broken leg and my poor old dog was howling in pain.
This cop comes along, takes one look at my horse and
shoots him dead. Then he goes over to my dog, looks
at him and shoots him dead too. Then he come straight
over to me and asked me how I was feeling…
Now, what the heck would you have said to him?”
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Contempt Fine
A New York man was forced to take a day off
from work to appear for a minor traffic summons.
He grew increasingly restless as he waited hour
after endless hour for his case to be heard.
When his name was called late in the afternoon,
he stood before the judge, only to hear that court
would be adjourned for the next day and he
would have to return the next day.
“What for?” he snapped at the judge.
His honor, equally irked by a tedious day and
sharp query roared, “Twenty dollars contempt
of court. That’s why!”
Then, noticing the man checking his wallet,
the judge relented. “That’s all right. You don’t
have to pay now.”
The man replied, “I’m just seeing if I have enough
for two more words…”
Thank you for reading today’s issue of JOKES Journal.
