Welcome to Tuesday’s Edition!

In today’s issue …

1) Split Luggage
2) Today’s Opportunity
3) A New Secretary

See It Work…Before You Pay…Autopilot Money
Actually converts your prospects for you.
Builds your downline on Autopilot. Just Plug In
Exactly the type of business you’ve been looking for
Take the FREE tour and watch it work in Real Time.
Go to: http://www.slimberrypro.com/jaybird62

A student was flying home to London from Edinburgh.

At the check-in, he said to the operator, “Now I want
you to send my black case to London and my blue case
to Amsterdam.”

The check-in operator replied, “I’m sorry sir, we can’t
do that!”

“Oh really,” said the student, “that’s what you did the
last time I flew with you!”

Get a BREAK now and let us present

TODAY’s OPPORTUNITY
brought to you by Ezine Classified Ads

Build Your Affiliate Marketing Empire!
Your affiliate business should be making more money.
You need help, and not just a website and a checklist.
Our mentoring program gives you tools, training, & coaching.
One low price payment. 60 days to try it for yourself.
See our incredible short-term offer: http://getplrempire.com

A guy walked into his friend’s office. He found his friend
sitting at his desk, looking very depressed.

“Hey, what’s up with you?”, he asked.

“Oh, its my wife,” replied the man sadly. “She’s hired a
new secretary for me.”

“Well, nothing wrong in that,” he said, “Is she blonde or
brunette?”

“Neither. He’s bald.”

Thank you for reading today’s issue of JOKES Journal.

Welcome to Tuesday’s Edition!

In today’s issue …

1) Overloaded Passenger
2) Today’s Opportunity
3) Truck Driver

Satellite Direct Brings Thousands of TV Channels
Straight to Your PC
http://bit.ly/bBQflw

My wife, a flight attendant for a major airline, watched one
day as a passenger overloaded with bags tried to stuff his
belongings in the overhead bin of the plane.

Finally, she informed him that he would have to check the
oversized luggage.

“When I fly other airlines,” he said irritably, “I don’t have
this problem.”

My wife smiled,

“When you fly other airlines, I don’t have this problem either.”

Get a BREAK now and let us present

TODAY’s OPPORTUNITY
brought to you by Ezine Classified Ads

How To Push A Button And Get Leads…
Learn how this master marketer is getting 1000s of leads
A day using what you are reading now … Ezines
Imagine getting 100s or 1000s of leads a day all on
Auto-pilot. Get your exclusive blueprint here:
http://ezine.theproleadsystem.com/?t=ecap

There was a man driving down the road behind
an 18 wheeler.

At every stoplight the trucker would get out of
the cab, run back and bang on the trailer door.
After seeing this at several intersections in a row
the motorist followed him until he pulled into a
parking lot.

When they both had come to a stop the truck
driver once again jumped out and started banging
on the trailer door. The motorist went up to him
and said,

“I don’t mean to be nosey but why do you keep
banging on that door?”

To which the trucker replied,

“Sorry, can’t talk now, I have 20 tons of canaries
and a 10 ton limit. So I have to keep half of them
flying at all times.”

Thank you for reading today’s issue of JOKES Journal.

Welcome to Thursday’s Edition!

In today’s issue …

1) Investment Counselor
2) Today’s Opportunity
3) An Artist, a Lawyer & a Blogger

Risk = Reward
Sacrifice = Victory
Have you ever wanted your own website?
Have you ever wanted a passive income?
It is more simple than you could ever imagine.
http://tinyurl.com/2526kpe

An investment counselor decided to go out on her own.
She was shrewd and diligent, so business kept coming in,
and pretty soon she realized that she needed an in-house
counsel. The investment banker began to interview young
lawyers.

“As I’m sure you can understand,” she started off with one
of the first applicants, “in a business like this, our personal
integrity must be beyond question.” She leaned forward.
“Mr. Mayberry, are you an honest lawyer?”

“Honest?” replied the job prospect. “I’m so honest that
my father lent me $15,000 for my education, and I paid
back every penny the minute I tried my very first case.”

“Impressive. And what sort of case was that?” asked the
investment counselor.

The lawyer squirmed in his seat and admitted,
“He sued me for the money.”

Get a BREAK now and let us present

TODAY’s OPPORTUNITY
brought to you by Ezine Classified Ads

Did you miss this powerful marketing resource?
Download Your FREE Blueprint!
How To Make A Realistic 6-Figure Income
Using ARTICLE MARKETING ONLY!
http://rankwitharticles.com/report.php

An artist, a lawyer, and a blogger are discussing
the merits of a mistress.

The artist tells of the passion, the thrill which comes with
the risk of being discovered.

The lawyer warns of the difficulties. It can lead to guilt,
divorce, bankruptcy. Not worth it. Too many problems.

The blogger says “It’s the best thing that’s ever
happened to me. My wife thinks I’m with my mistress.
My mistress thinks I’m home with my wife, and I can
spend all night on the computer!”

Thank you for reading today’s issue of JOKES Journal.

Welcome to Wednesday’s Edition!

In today’s issue …

1) Politician’s Haircut
2) Today’s Opportunity
3) An Immigrant from Poland

Before getting a haircut a politician asked his stylist,
“How long will this take, how much will it cost, and
how good will this look?”

The stylist replied, “Just ten minutes, cost $20, and
look marvelous.”

An hour and fifteen minutes later, the politician looked
into the mirror in horror and the stylist handed him a
bill for $200.

The politician gasped, “You took too long, it doesn’t
look that great, and it’s costing me ten times more
than you said!”

The stylist replied, “That makes us even.”

Get a BREAK now and let us present

TODAY’s OPPORTUNITY
brought to you by Priority Classified Ads

We provide you a business that is your own and is totally
under your control. Your business will be advertised by us
24/7. Anyone can afford it. The cost is as low as $7 per
month. It truly is a money maker. No scam here…take a peak.
http://tinyurl.com/3ydye64

One day, an immigrant from Poland entered a New York
City Police Precinct to report that his American wife was
planning to kill him.

The police officer on duty was intrigued by this, and he
asked, “How sure are you that she is gonna kill you?
Did she threaten to kill you?”

“No,” replied the nervous immigrant.

“Did you hear her tell someone else that she’s gonna kill you?”

“No.”

“Did someone tell you that your wife is gonna kill you?”

“No.”

“Then why did you think she’s gonna kill you?” asked the
exasperated police officer.

“Because I found bottle on dresser and I think she gonna
poison me!” He handed the police officer the suspect bottle.

The police officer took one look at the label on the bottle
and started to laugh out loud.

The immigrant became indignant and said,

“What’s so funny? Can’t you see the label on bottle said
‘Polish Remover’?”

Thank you for reading today’s issue of JOKES Journal.

Welcome to Thursday’s Edition!

In today’s issue …

1) Blind Pilot
2) Today’s Opportunity
3) New Sport

Passengers on a small commuter plane are waiting for
the flight to leave. The entrance opens, and two men
walk up the aisle, dressed in pilots uniforms. Both are
wearing dark glasses, one is using a seeing-eye dog,
and the other is tapping his way up the aisle with a cane.

Nervous laughter spreads through the cabin; but the men
enter the cockpit, the door closes, and the engines start up.

The passengers begin glancing nervously around,
searching for some sign that this just a little practical joke.
None is forthcoming. The plane moves faster and faster
down the runway, and people at the windows realize that
they’re headed straight for the water at the edge of the
airport territory.

As it begins to look as though the plane will never take off,
that it will plow into the water, panicked screams fill the
cabin, but at that moment, the plane lifts smoothly into the air.

The passengers relax and laugh a little sheepishly, and soon
they have all retreated into their magazines, secure in the
knowledge that the plane is in good hands.

Up in the cockpit, the copilot turns to the pilot and says,
“You know, Bob, one of these days, they’re going to
scream too late, and we’re all gonna die…”

Get a BREAK now and let us present

TODAY’s OPPORTUNITY
brought to you by Ezine Classified Ads

Crack the code to making $1K/day! http://tinyurl.com/36qu2no
He Made $2,376.24 His 1st Month! http://tinyurl.com/237ja3w
Ezines Can Supercharge Ur Biz http://tinyurl.com/35hdsnh
Free Online ATM! http://www.smartmoneymakers1.com
Learn The Online Secrets Smartly! http://tinyurl.com/2v49uvh
Recession Buster, $245+/Day. http://www.smartmoneyelite.com

First man: My wife suggested that I take up a new
sport this summer.

Second man: Well, that’s nice. It shows that she has
your interests at heart. Did she make any suggestions?

First man: As a matter of fact, she did. By the way,
how do you play this Russian Roulette?

Thank you for reading today’s issue of JOKES Journal.