A blonde is terribly overweight, so her doctor puts her on a diet.
“I want you to eat regularly for two days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for two weeks. The next time I see you, you’ll have lost at least five pounds.”
A doctor at an insane asylum decided to take his patients to a baseball game. For weeks in advance, he coached his patients to respond to his commands.
When the day of the game arrived everything went quite well…
As the National Anthem started, the doctor yelled, “Up Nuts”, and the patients complied by standing up.
After the anthem, he yelled, “Down Nuts”, and they all sat back down in their seats. (more…)
Hospital regulations require a wheelchair for patients being discharged.
However, while working as a student nurse, I found one elderly gentleman, already dressed and sitting on the bed with a suitcase at his feet, who insisted he didn’t need my help to leave the hospital.
After a chat about rules being rules, he reluctantly let me wheel him to the elevator.
At the exit I asked him if his wife was meeting him.
“I don’t know,” he said. “She’s still upstairs in the bathroom changing out of her hospital gown.” (more…)