Cat Working for IRS

Low Income, Luxurious Villa

Cat Working for IRS “How have you managed to buy such a luxurious villa while your income is so low?” asked the IRS auditor.

“Well,” the taxpayer answered, “while fishing last summer I have caught a large golden fish. When I took it off the hook, the fish opened his mouth and said,

‘I am a magical fish. Throw me back to the sea and I’ll give you the most luxurious villa you have ever seen’.

I threw the fish back to the sea, and got the villa.” (more…)

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People vs. Government Comics

A Nervous Taxpayer

People vs. Government Comics

A nervous taxpayer was unhappily conversing with the IRS Tax Auditor who had come to review his records.

At one point, the auditor exclaimed,

“Mr. Carr, we feel it is a great privilege to be allowed to live and work in the USA. As a citizen you have an obligation to pay taxes, and we expect you to eagerly pay them with a smile.”

(more…)

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The Businessman and the IRS Agent

The owner of a small deli was being questioned by an IRS
agent about his tax return. He had reported a net profit of
$80,000 for the year.

“Why don’t you people leave me alone?” the deli owner said.
“I work like a dog, everyone in my family helps out, the place
is only closed three days a year… and you want to know how
I made $80,000?”

“It’s not the income that bothers us,” the agent said,
“but these deductions. You listed six trips to Bermuda
for you and your wife.”

“Oh, that,” the owner said smiling. “Didn’t I mention?
We deliver anywhere…”

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New Sport

First man: My wife suggested that I take up a new sport this summer.

Second man: Well, that’s nice. It shows that she has your interests at heart. Did she make any suggestions?

First man: As a matter of fact, she did. By the way, how do you play this Russian Roulette?

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Squeezing Lemons

The local pub was so sure that its barman was the strongest
man around that it offered a standing one thousand dollars
bet that no one could beat him.

The challenge was that the barman would squeeze a lemon
until all the juice ran out into a beer glass, then hand the
lemon to a customer. Anyone who could squeeze even one
more drop out of the lemon would win the money.

Over the years many people had tried this, truck drivers,
weightlifters and all had failed.

Then one day this frail little fella with heavy rimmed spectacles
came into the bar and asked if he could try the challenge.

After the laughter had subsided the barman said that it was
only fair that the man be given a chance at the bet, so he
picked up a lemon and started squeezing.

Once he was done he handed the remains to the little man
who promptly squeezed out 4 more drops of juice onto
the bar…

Everyone looked on in amazement as the barman handed
over the prize and asked,

“What do you do for a living that has given you such
strength? Are you a lumberjack, weightlifter, what?”

“No” the man replied, “I work for IRS.”

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By the end of October 2017, Jokes Journal will become an ad-free zone. In plain English, no ads of any kind will hinder you anymore. However, the site and the newsletter cannot continue to exist without your support.

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In December - based on your action or inaction - we will decide whether this site will be shut down for ever or will continue to deliver nice jokes to you.

Earring

A man is at work one day when he notices that his
co-worker is wearing an earring.

This man knows his co-worker to be a somewhat
conservative fellow, so naturally he’s curious about
the sudden change in fashion sense.

The man walks up to his co-worker and says,
“I didn’t know you were into earrings.”

“Don’t make such a big deal, it’s only an earring,”
he replies sheepishly.

“Well, I’m curious,” begged the man, “how long have you been wearing an earring?”

“…ever since my wife found it in our bed.”

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